Virtual-itis: Part One

VIRTUAL-ITIS:  A Socratic Dialogue with a Modern Christian. 

The dialogue takes place during sleep, in a dream.
                                                        

        Only the soul can experience an absence that is  presence, an emptiness that is  filling, a longing that is an enjoying.  Such an experience occurs when the soul awakens and comes alive in the remembrance of Selfless Love.  Today this experience is more and more absent to us and as a result our hungers have no meaning.  We fill ourselves obliviously with empty data, factoids, and bytes.  Diversions, distractions, multiply like virtual loaves. Only in the silent, empty desert will the Mystery of Selfless Love once again dazzle us.

                                                

Voice: Why do you sleep so fitfully? What bothers you?

Modern Christian:  What? Who are you? Am I dreaming?

V:  You may call me Socrates. I was sent to help you know yourself better. Yes, you are dreaming, but the dream is real, more so than the daytime hours you spend walking around in a fog.

MC: How can I be sure? Maybe I am having a nightmare, or going crazy. 

 V: You are already driving yourself crazy. Yourwhole life is a nightmare of worry and anxiety. Do not be afraid of me. You have nothing to lose and much to gain. Tell me: what is bothering you?

MC:  Well, I am having a hard time making decisions.  I can’t sort out my thoughts and feelings and come to a conclusion.   One day one thing seems good to me, the next day something else. Why can’t I be as sure of myself as I used to be?  

V: You may have a common yet unrecognized virus that infects much of the world's population,  a virus called  “virtual-itis.” This is a sickness that comes from a loss of contact with reality. How serious the sickness is depends on how far removed you are from reality. May I ask you some questions? I need to see how badly this virus affects you.  

MC:   What harm can it do?. Ask away. What would you like to know?  

V: Does your mind feel like a cargo crate or like your stomach?

MC:  I don’t understand.  My mind doesn't feel like anything. Not like a cargo crate, not like my stomach. What are you getting at?  

V:  A cargo crate can be empty or full. But it is indifferent to both emptiness and fullness.  It is neither happy nor unhappy over what is placed in it.  Like a cargo crate, your stomach can be empty. But the stomach knows it is empty.  That’s why you feel hungry!  So the stomach is not indifferent to being empty.  Nor is the stomach indifferent to what gets put in it.  It wants tasty food that nourishes it, food that contains the vitamins, minerals, carbs, and proteins which the rest of the body needs.  And after it gets that stuff, the stomach knows what to do with it.  It knows how to break it down and what to send where.  The stomach finds satisfaction in fullness and frustration in emptiness. 

MC. Okay, okay, enough already!  I see what you mean. But I thought the mind was like a blank slate. Isn't that  how the mind works, something like a slate on which you write information?  I thought being a brainy, knowledgeable person meant you had gathered up a lot of information and knew how to use the information to get what you wanted.

V:  That would reduce the brain pretty much to a computer memory bank.  But the brain is more  like a smart cat playing with a ball of string. The cat pokes it, rolls it, runs around it, pounces on it, backs off and leaves it there,then jumps on it again. Of course, if it is a mouse or a canary instead of a ball of string, when the cat is finished playing with it, he finally eats it.  That’s the way the mind works. It plays with an idea, looks at it from one angle and then another, compares it to this and that. The mind questions and pokes the idea and rolls it around before deciding whether or not to leave it be or eat it. Sometimes the mind will swallow it.  And once your mind swallows the idea, it also knows what to do with it.  

MC: Sorry, you are losing me.  What are you getting at? 

V:  Just as the stomach cannot use any old thing we put into it, the mind is meant to take in truth. The hunger of the mind is for truth. The mind is nourished by truth, not just by information or data or factoids.  Today we seem to have forgotten that a mind cannot be healthy without truth. We think just having a crate full of data is enough to fill us. 

MC:  I see what you're saying.  What food is to the stomach,  truth is  to the mind.  How about this: two people discussing an idea are like your two cats, playing with a ball, rolling it around, back and forth to one another. Isn't that a good image for two persons having a discussion or a brainstorming session or even a debate? As they toss the idea around they clarify it, see it differently, and maybe help it acquire depth they didn’t know was there before.   That’s what you mean by the mind being like a playful curious cat, and not just a blank slate, right? 

V: Yes.  You do begin to see!  Healthy people have that kind of mind that is inquisitive, searching, and hungry for truth. They are interested in learning more and more about the truth they already know.  Unhealthy people have a mind like a crate or slate, they don’t care what is inside or written on it, nor have a sense of what to do with what they have inside. The truth to them is just a lot of data or information.  You, on the other hand, may get healthy by talking to me. 

MC. By healthy or unhealthy I presume you are referring to this virus you are talking about?  Virtual-itis?  

V. Yes.   A crate type mind is one symptom of the disease.  Another is a spectator mentality.  That means you...
MC. Wait a minute! I don't buy everything you have said. It is your opinion, and you have a right to it. But I see things a different way. I have a different value system. You don't have any right to impose your way of seeing on me. I am free to see things the way I want therm to be.
V. No you are not. You are free to accept reality or deny it. But once you deny reality, you separate yourself from truth and start living by self deception.
MC. This conversation is over! Go away! Sneak into my head some other day. I don't want to play mind games with you any more right now.

Life Online

 How do you view the World-Wide-Web? As another form of entertainment? 

No, a lot better than that,  and a lot worse too. The Internet is much more seductive and addictive than TV, or movies or any form of entertainment. And  it is also much more open to both good and evil.

Why do you say that? 

Because of the extremes the Internet embraces, the good and bad uses of the Internet.  Look at Internet addiction, for example. TV is to Internet as marijuana is to heroin or cocaine. TV, the lesser or milder addiction,  prepares the way for the stronger and more overpowering. The Internet can get us so caught up in our own grandiosity that we become completely blind to how stuck we are on ourselves, and are totally convinced that we are very self giving and generous with all the people we are in touch with online. The Web easily becomes Ego-inflation under the guise of  self-donation. The self-deceit the Internet invites us to engage in is infinite in scope.

That sounds extreme and exaggerated. The Internet is only a tool that can be put to whatever use one wants to use it for. It's not evil in itself.  Like marijuana, for example: marijuana can be put to bad use, but it can be used for medicinal purposes too. 

We're saying the same thing. Anything good can be put to a bad use. And the bad use, the abuse, does not deny the goodness of the proper use. But the abuse of the Internet is more harmful than other abuses precisely because the Internet seems so benign as a tool. 

 What proof do you have that the Internet can be so good and so bad? 

Look at the evidence for yourself.  One example where you can find the data is on the Internet: look into the volume of porn sites, the variety of porn that is available nationally and internationally, plus the ever increasing amount of money spent on Internet porn. It is in the billions of dollars. Think of the money, hours, energy, lives wasted, both by the purveyors and the users. Incalculable. That's just one example of tremendous misuse. It is also possible to participate  in Twelve step programs on the Internet, which is certainly a good use,  to deal both with alcohol or sex addictions, but the participants are minuscule in proportion to those of us who are addicted.

Don't you read blogs, or news reports, or do research online? 

Yes. The Internet is a good tool for that. But, by its nature, the Internet encourages superficiality, not depth. 

But the intellectual work of the greatest minds is made available on or through the Internet! The Web is like a world library at your fingertips. That's not superficiality. 

It may be out there, but it is buried under mountains and mountains of  error, opinion, misinformation, half-truths, trivia and nonsense, so the wisdom of the ages is hardly at your fingertips. No search engine can perform the work of sorting out the fool's gold from the real thing. Search engines have no sense of value, no way to prioritize or measure worth.  You know the verse in the Gospel where Christ talks about a drag-net that collects all sorts of things, good and bad, and then the angels sort it out? That's not a bad image of the Internet, except we aren't angels when it comes to sorting out, and easily lose ourselves in enthusiasms that are self destructive. 

 Doesn't the Internet facilitate global communication? Isn't that a great boon?You can be in touch with people everywhere! 

Yes, but communication has many levels, levels of intimacy and trust, and takes time to develop. Some people actually do speak the truth  with love on the Internet.  But many of us are just narcissistic and exhibitionistic, instead of humbly and honestly communicating. I still cherish a hand written letter as the most thoughtful and honest communication, even though some blogs come close. Face to face conversation is next, telephone conversation is third, email is fourth, and texting doesn't even make my list. I hate cell phone chatter. It doesn't seem like real conversation, just constant wordiness without any real depth to it. I'm not saying that real communication doesn't take place on-line, just that the quantity of  the posing, posturing and spinning proliferates.

I bet you belong to Facebook or one of the other Internet social enclaves? 

 Yes, I like to see what like -minded people think, to stay in touch with people I don't see on a day by day basis, and to enjoy their perspectives.

Fine, but you already know what like -minded people think. 

True. But there is comfort in numbers, fun in the camaraderie, and strength in the mutual support..

Do you think true dialogue is possible on the Internet?  Only rarely. Exposure to opposing points of view certainly can take place. But genuine movement  towards truth? I think that requires a more personal setting. The Internet creates the illusion of intimacy, not the real thing.

       

The Threesome

 Part One: The Call

“And Jesus took Peter, James and John…” (Matthew 17:1)

Peter, James and John, stood out among the Twelve, because Christ called them to accompany Him at various times but left the other nine behind.   Because of that special blessing, I imagine Peter, James and John fell into the habit of getting together as a threesome and talking about Christ with one another. This meditation, the first of a series, is an attempt to enter into their conversations and see Christ as they were seeing Him, or better yet, as they were learning how to see Him, through talking about Him with one another.  It is not possible to associate all their conversations with specific events, places, and circumstances, in their common life with Christ. Nor, to express their insights and feelings as   experienced and expressed by them.  But since Truth emerges fresh and new in dialogue among friends, these conversations may help us to come in contact with the mysterious person of Christ who so captivated them. I invite you to listen to them, and enter into the dialogue with three witnesses who knew Him better than we do.

Peter: Do you two ever think about the day He called you? (James and John nod affirmatively.) So what do think about? What do you remember?

John: Well, I try to understand why I said yes. I mean, I don’t think I said “yes” in words, just said it by doing it. I still don’t know how to put it all into words. I’m sure I would not have left everything and followed anybody else who told me to follow him.

 James:  I began to follow Him because you did. I thought He would be a good teacher. He seemed wise, friendly, and honest to me, but I had no idea what He was like. I didn’t really understand what I was getting into. I don’t know when it dawned on me that this was going to on and on for the rest of my life. I’m sure I could walk away tomorrow if I decided to, and He wouldn’t stop me, but I know He wouldn’t want me to,  and I guess my point is, I don’t want to either.

John: So Peter, why did you decide to follow Him?

Peter: I don’t know all my reasons. I do remember that one of them was to protect Andrew.  Remember, Andrew brought me to Him. Andrew isn’t the best judge of people, and I wasn’t sure he wasn’t getting into trouble. Another reason was that I was curious. I wanted to see who this Jesus was that had impressed him.

 John: So why did you stay, instead of leaving and taking Andrew with you?

Peter: I’m not sure I can explain it.  I liked fishing, I enjoyed the work, not just catching the fish, but the selling too, talking to people from here and there, haggling with them over the price,  giving in a little, but getting them to agree with my price in the end. It was a good life. Sometimes I miss it. But not enough to leave this.

James: But that still doesn’t tell us why you said yes to His call in the first place. 

Peter: The best I can do is put it this way: I had a sense that He knew me better than I realized, that He saw through me. It was scary. I don’t know why I felt that way but I did.  Anyway, that was the feeling I had when He said He wanted to make me a “fisher of men”. It was as if He had my whole life worked and it was up to me if I wanted to say yes to it.  

James:  Gee, that would have been enough to shake me up and scare me off.  If I felt he saw through me the first time I was with him, and He had plans for my whole life, I would have said no to Him then and there.

John: Yes, but now you wouldn’t, because now you know you can trust Him, even though you don’t always understand Him.  As for me, I think I had lots of reasons why I said yes to his call, more reasons than I understand, but I think the basic reason back then was I felt a connection between us, a contact, that was deep inside my guts. I knew I liked Him, but his pull on me was deeper than any feeling that attracted me to Him.  I don’t know, I felt like He was already connected to me even though we had never spoken before. I guess I am saying I felt He already knew me better than I knew myself, and that connection made me say yes to Him.

Peter:  Keep talking. I think you are on to something.

John: No. I’ve thought about this a lot, and that’s the best I can do for now. But another thing I think about is why did He choose all of us? There are plenty of men out there He could have called. He seems to love everybody.  So why call us twelve instead of twelve others, and why stop at twelve?

(James and Peter both shrug and indicate they have no idea)

 John:  But He knows. He knows why he chose us three, and the others. And why He wants only twelve of us instead of ten or fifteen. Somehow He’s on top of what is happening.  He doesn’t force things, but He is in charge.  I think any of us could have said no to Him.  We still could. We could walk off tomorrow if we wanted to and He wouldn’t stop us. But somehow I think He knows we won’t.

Peter. Yeah, I think you are right about that.  I don’t think any of us want to leave. What I don’t get is why He doesn’t get fed up with us and send us away. 

John (delighted): That’s right, Peter!  Exactly!  If I were Him I would have gotten tired of the bunch of us by now.  But, that’s not His way.  Another thing I can’t understand, why does He pay more attention to the three of us than the other nine?  It’s not like we are better people. He’s as patient with them as He is with us. He corrects all of us all the time and isn’t worried about our feelings or reactions.  He is not afraid to come down hard on us. Yet He doesn’t do it to embarrass or humiliate any of us when He does it. He treats us all the same, in that sense. It’s like He expects us to act like idiots and never gets tired of us anyway.

James: That’s true. But He also treats each of a little differently. Like He knows what is going on in each one, what we are feeling and thinking, and always is considerate of us.

Peter: But why does He take us three with Him, and leave the others behind? I don’t get that at all. I mean, I love it, but I don’t understand it.

John: I’m not sure, but I think there is less to it, and also more to it, than we think.

Peter: What do you mean?

 John: Well, the easy answer is this: We three are the most difficult to deal with of everybody there. James and I are the most emotional, and have the most explosive tempers. You, Peter, are the most thick-headed and stubborn. You are also very impulsive and rash. So I think He is doing the group a favor by not always leaving us with them when He has something to do. I also think in some crazy way we three are the hardest nuts for Him to crack, if you get what I mean. And so He is doing us a favor by taking us with Him, because He knows we need more of His attention.

James: I never thought of that. But when I hear you say it, it rings true.

 Peter: Yes. It does. And you know, there is probably another reason too. I bet He knows that in order for the group to be able to work together, He has to be able to get us three to work together.  If He can do that with us, the others will fall into line.

 John. You may be right. With Him I think there is always more to everything He says and does than we can take in at any one time, because there is more to Him all the time.  

Peter:  James, why you stay instead of leaving?

 James: I never thought about that before. I suppose it is because even though this is the hardest thing I have ever done, it is also the most exciting.  No, exciting isn’t what I mean. Sometimes it is exciting and sometimes it is frustrating, but it is never boring. That’s it. That’s what I want to say. When I am around Him, when I pay attention to Him, I feel more alive as a result.  He makes life into an adventure. Before, without Him, it got boring.